I've officially given up on the Y chromosome. I'm tired of waiting around for something to happen, for that call to come. Everyone's been following my love life so closely now, like its the latest soap on tv or something. Well I'm sorry but I'm just like everyone else. So fuck off already. I'm not with anyone, so stop asking. And all those rumours going around. I hate how everyone's bitching about me behind my back. I'm not some playgirl or what okay. Is it so hard to fathom that I can have other things on my mind other than boys?

I'm gonna become like super nerd. Aside from watching all my shows as per normal, I'm gonna start doing my work instead of reading mags and sleeping all the time. Like really belated new year's resolution. I've got the weekend to study for this bio test next week. By fluke I passed the last one ( hell I even topped the class; all five of us ) without studying, but I'm absolutely lost now. New terms all over the place. Tired of being sent to the back of class to finish last night's work or being banished to my corner of malay class.

Maybe then people will think of me different. Oh who gives a fuck.

Its only wednesday and already there's been too much drama this week. Betweeen breakups and makeups ( with different parties okay ), bitch calls and rumours, backlash from that truth or dare we just had to play, and assorted unknown relatives dying everywhere, I'm surprised my sanity's still intact.

Yikes. Add that to yelling at by every teacher I have. I'm gonna change my name to a super cheena one. Then it'll be harder to remember. Though then everyone would remember, cause I'd be the only indian freak with a chinese name. Ahhh. There's just no winning.

My maid cooked dinner with peanut oil. And didn't tell me. Bitch. Now I'm gonna be throwing up all night. I'm already super nice to her lah. Like not telling my parents she goes to meet her bf every afternoon when they're not at home. She's so taking my covering up for her for granted lah.

I feel sick. Gonna go sleep early. Even though I kinda just woke up.

Aiyoh. I miss all my ij kawan a lot. They came over last night, and we got super a lot of things accomplished lah. We viewed everyone's respective hot guys ( one's in my school!), gossiped way too much, made fun of random people on friendster all, put on many many calories from countless slices of pizza, and even formed a band lah. So without further ado, I present the three founding members of B.D.R.!!

I couldn't quite do the whole rock thing.

Sweetness defined.

The act-cutes. We took this shot way too many times.

More on the pizza party later, visiting assorted relatives now. I miss you all already! AHH.

I ran my 2.4 today. Okay who am I kidding, I walked my 2.4 today. PE guy has something against me I swear. I didn't bring my asthma inhaler and he made me run. Aileen didn't bring her PE attire and she got to slack. UNFAIRNESS.

I got home at like 3.30 today. For the first time in like two weeks. It was so strange walking home feeling the sun. And the only reason I got to was cause I skipped CCA. I found a slacker CCA to join. CCC. Don't ask me what it stands for, cause I really have no clue. Its some charity cip nonsense thing. But its once a week and sounds better than mind games.

Shane's totally jealous of the new guy. Bugging me non-stop about it. You'd think he'd have gotten the hint the last 97465834 times I said i didn't want to go out with him. Oh speaking of which, I feel positively paedophilic. This sec 2 guy asked for my number at the bus stop today. In true Clarissa fashion, I was horrified and ran as fast as I could into the nearest bus, which happened to be 107 for once.

That's about all I have to say now. Oh except I totally guessed what was gonna happen in this week's prison break. The show has been so unpredictable so I'm feeling super proud of myself. And Wentworth Miller's just about the hottest guy ever. AHH.

School's been really bleahh as of late. I hate how all the teachers naturally assume that since we're in SR we're all retarded. They keep repeating everything a million times, like never moving on. And its only the easy stuff that they go slowly at, complicated things they just rush through. I'm so not used to having to go home and re-read everything just to faintly understand what's going on.

People at SR are okay I guess. I mean I obviously miss all my friends, and I do feel quite loner-ish here, but I guess everyone does right. I guess it just takes time to get used to the whole new atmosphere.

P.E was absolutely terrible. Like seriously, one P.E session at SR is equivalent to 4 at IJ. My class ran like 7 rounds today. 2 for warm-up, and 5 continuously. That's just crazy. Obviously I gave up at the third one. There's so much running at every P.E session here that I've totally been exaggerating my asthma. I doubt anyone at IJ even knew I was asthmatic. Anyway, the teacher's getting annoyed at me too I think. He told me I had to find out what the trigger to my asthma was. Usually its like dust or when guinness sheds too much or whatever, but I said running was. I swear he wanted to slap me. I would have slapped me. Oh well.

Dance was quite a disaster. I don't know why, I just don't like the dance here. Its like the people are super bitchy and all. I got pissed off and walked out halfway-through. I think it was really obvious that I was hating every moment of it. I was acting damn useless lah. Like just totally slacking at everything. So I was just like walking around when everyone was jumping here and there. Ish was damn enthu. I have no clue what she sees in dance though. Such a bimbo CCA. At least in SR anyway. Everyone's favourite move here is thrusting their chest out. And considering most of them are really flat, its quite funny to watch.

I think its guitar for me. But I'll have to keep bringing my guitar to school and all. I think its really out of tune or whatever, cause I totally haven't touched it in YEARS. And plus the cockroach might jump out if I open the case. I'll get Shane to open it the next time he comes over.

I think I should get some sleep. My 8 hours a day plan is failing quite miserably. Trying to erase months worth of dark circles is amazingly tough. Or maybe its just me. Sigh.

When I was young I knew everything
She a punk who rarely ever took advice
Now I'm guilt stricken,
Sobbing with my head on the floor
Stop a baby's breath and a shoe full of rice

I can't be held responsible
She was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place

For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and
We'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen

My best friend took a week's
Vacation to forget her
His girl took a weeks's worth of
Valium and slept
And now he's guilt stricken sobbing with his
Head on the floor
Thinks about her now and how he never really
Wept he says

I can't be held responsible
She was touching her face
I won't be held responsible
She fell in love in the first place


For the life of me
I cannot remember
What made us think that we were wise and
We'd never compromise
For the life of me I cannot believe
We'd ever die for these sins
We were merely freshmen

freshmen - verve pipe

I need to update soon. Like seriously.